against the world

when the world seems to have you bent
you run away till your feet bled
you smoke till your chest hurt
you cried till your tears dried,
your face cracked

you wanted to holler at the sea, the sun and the wind
you wanted to disappear with drops of rains to the ground,
never to see the ocean again

you wanted to take a curb at full speed,
not to see the limit
you wanted to tear your heart out,
to have feelings eliminated

longing
itching
craving
raging

yet you are trembling with fears
yet there are so much things

yes, it's you against the world

the battle you will never win
the antidote you will never find
to an excruciating, yet cureless
and unending pain

(salemba, 2003)

>-"wi-fi", the next big thing in wireless communication

read wired.com may 2003 edition this morning. i haven't been there for years, only to find out they still have similar GUI to several years ago. not that i'm complaining. after browsing the site for a while, i bumped into their may 2003 edition: Issue 11.05 UNWIRED - A Wired Special Report - May 2003 on "get wireless" -- basically a pretty thorough look using non-geek lingo into the wonderful world of "wi-fi".

"wi-fi" is the next big thing after "3G" mobile technology that enables you to do a lot of things with your petite mobile device, from texting to sending pictures to record short video and exchange them with other users up to sending e-mails and browsing the so-called 'world-web-wait' from users' tiny mobile screen (despite recent pretty big screens in PDAs and other mobiles, for me it's still something smaller than regular 14 inch screen ).

"wi-fi" will allow you and your gadgets (mobile handset, PDAs, notebooks, etc.) to hook up to the net without any wire. true, without those nerve-breaking telephone fee and RJ-11 nor RJ-45 cables. hassle and tangle free.

but the still, despite the wonderful idea, existing and functioning technology, would "wi-fi" bandwagon "internet cable" and/or "adsl", "isdn", bluetooth" etc. in its acceptance and usage among wider public? especially public with limited internet access.

is "wi-fi" an alternative to expensive internet connection? what about the management of different radio frequencies used as the medium? how much do people have to pay? true, the price of "wi-fi" gadgets has been decreasing, but to what extent? the question of public infrastructure and low cost alternative internet connection are still valid as these seem to be the possible way out to equal distribution of information to all level and class of users worldwide.

the best thing about "wi-fi" that i myself agree is the nature of dematerialization. can you imagine the world without copper cables or plastic cables? cut down the amount of cables, but what about the physical storage hardwares? how can we dematerialize "hard disks", "compact disks" and all those teeny tiny electronic components that make up your personal computer at home and at work.

sputnik sweetheart

I'm definitely addicted to haruki murakami. yes, that forty-something, capricorn sign-bearer, japanese novelist who left japan because his novels hits super best seller in 1980s. His works are so surrealistic, out of this world, mind-boggling; yet intense, bit romantic and leaving some aftertaste of conundrum state in the last pages.

I've been glued to his works ever since "wind up bird chronicle" to "norwegian wood" and "sputnik sweetheart" and now "a wild sheep chase". it's always a 'one sitting reading time'. the worn-out sofa in the living room, in bed extinguishing my insomnia in vain, at the al fresco starbucks joint somewhere in the western part of the city.

my addiction to murakami was similar to the works of tom clancy and frederick forsyth ten years back, during my early adulthood back in my freshman years. those were the hey days of post-cold war era, when their works brought me to a dream-like state of occidental capital cities with all those exotic places and nerve-burning actions. even despite the movies, i still deem their books as far more better entertainment. (yes, clancy's "clear and present danger" and "the sum of all fears" are big loosers!)

murakami takes you to the edge of insanity and push your logic of regular, daily patterns and habits to the verge of everything that you thought you might know.

"the wind up bird chronicle" was my first handshake with the guy. i picked up the book only because it was on sale in an imported book store with a natural-post mo style architecture in an expat quarter down in the southern part of the city.

the wind up bird chronicle -- left my brain buzzing and my ears ringing.
norwegian wood -- i had to stop three times for meals and for breaks because the yarn was simple but damn ludacrist.
sputnik sweetheart -- i changed places many times in reading it.

-to be continued-